I traveled to North Carolina a few weeks ago and was able to meet with a dear friend of mine! I call her my Christian mentor. She and her husband have a son who has been/is still on drugs. They have fought this battle for about 8 years I believe. As she and I were sitting outside talking we were talking about decisions we have made, or are trying to make for our sons. There are many times that people just don't understand why you make certain decisions. You may have family members who say, "Well, if I were you, I'd..." or " "You need too..." You know, it's your child and you know your child better than anyone besides the Holy Spirit of God. Listening to the Holy Spirit is your best bet! Things may not make sense to others as to the decisions you make for your child, and who cares?
I was talking to another friend of mine the other day with a small, nine MONTH old child. She is up at night with her a lot. She still nurses during the night. I could look at that situation and offer advise, because both of mine were sleeping all night at six and eight "weeks" old. What the Lord has taught me over these past few weeks is: Sometimes, situations are different. Children are different... With infants and teens! You just have to do what you feel is best at the time and what you feel is best with your child. I'm not up with my friend every night. I am not suffering from sleep deprivation, she is. She told me that she does what she has to do to get through. You know, that's ok.. it doesn't make her a bad mom or her child behind in some way.
With teenagers, it's much the same. There is no guidebook that shows us a sure-fire way to get your teen to come home five minutes "before" curfew! There's no guidebook that will guarantee that your child will never do drugs! There is not a book titled: How To Raise the Perfect Child. Well, there probably is, but anyway... In reality, they don't come with instructions tattooed on their backs when they're born of how they are individually wired and if something goes wrong... do this! You can't reboot or reprogram them like a computer! It's a day by day challenge of decision making.
I have felt that we have been judged by certain people on how we have done things with our son... One particular person has not even been through this with a child at all. The other person has been through a little with their child, but not even close to the magnitude of what we have been through with ours. I do have a lot of people who tell us that we have done a great job and that Stephan couldn't have had better parents through this! : )
There's also always going to be a battle in your own mind as to whether you are making the right decisions. Trust the one who knows your child best...and guess what? It ain't you! Trust His leading! As my friend and I from NC discussed, each day may be different. You may allow him to be home one day and not the other. Each day can change. It doesn't matter if "man" understands... feel confident that the Holy Spirit does!! My teen is changing everyday and he is challenging us .. everyday!
Holy Spirit rain down... rain down. Let your power fall, let your voice be heard.. Holy Spirit rain down... rain down.
