Stephan's been staying with his brother and wife for the last few days. Well, let me say "when" he's there he's staying with them. Right now Stephan's homeless... if it weren't for his brother, I don't know where he'd stay.. In his car I guess! He's almost out of options!
Stephan being in their home has reeked havoc on their marriage in just a short time- one week to be specific! He say's he'll be home at 10:00- then he doesn't show, or he'll come in at 12:00 knowing they have a baby and that Brandon has to work the next day! He says he's going to church with them- they save him a seat- he stands them up! He comes in drunk... He really embarrassed them in front of Ellie's friend Hannah the other night... the list goes on.
Part of a "sorta planned out plan" for the near future is Stephan moving here!!! You'll have to re-read some posts to catch up.... In the mean time, he's staying there to pay off a ticket. He still has a job... He's wanting to get a few pay checks under his belt, etc.
Richard and I bought a new place here. We're moving in two weeks! Yep..... two weeks! I've been up there for the last three weeks painting, scraping, putting in new this and new that! You know the drill! Since hearing of Stephan coming here, I can say it's put a damper on my excitement. I love him! Oh, gosh I love him!!! But he lies... he steals... he comes home drunk... he's loud... he makes our life pretty miserable at times! Since moving to WI, Richard and I have been pals. We go on dates, we go get coffee, we eat ice cream! Am I about to relive the last three years all over again??? OR- has this time apart from us done Stephan some good? He's lived on his own, he's paid his car insurance and his rent. Well, for as long as he had the apartment anyway. He didn't get to live with Travis long enough to pay rent or split rent... whatever they were gonna do...
I don't understand the Travis situation very well. Stephan says he's afraid of him now... Stephan's stuff is still in his apartment and he won't go get it. I duhh no....
Stephan has mentioned coming here, getting a good job, starting school. That all sounds really great. Stephan's said a lot of good things! I'm really believing Stephan says what we want to hear. Richard and I were talking last night on our way home. I said, "How long did it take Stephan to find "Caleb?" How long did it take him to find "Justin?" How long did it take for him to find "Antonio?" You know, it won't take him long to find another "friend" here that drinks and does drugs too! I told Richard that my time of being hopeful is almost over. I'm bracing myself for another episode of "Days of my Life!" I don't want it to be this way.
I wish I trusted his word more, but I can't.
I can't cure him.... I can't do anything for him! All I can do is let him destroy my demeanor all over again to where I don't want to even face my neighbors out of embarrassment! Now, we're moving into a Condo community, which makes having neighbors even worse!!!! Richard and I don't plan on living here too long, so we went the condo route, now I wish we'd bought a house!
If he gets here and starts it all over again, we will have to tell him to leave... We've done it before. We want to assist him in moving forward, yet he has to help us help him!!! If he won't, we can't do it again....
I can't! Things like this destroy lives and those lives around the addict. It destroys marriages and homes... it's ugly.
God give us wisdom...
